At the start of 2021, I was as miserable and lonely as anyone else, but I was primarily very bored. I was only semi-employed, wounded by a brutal breakup, and living in a small nonsmoking apartment filled with tacky turtle sculptures in my Southern California hometown. The only nonrelative I saw regularly was a part-time male model with a defined iliac furrow who came over once a week for vigorous sex, sans all but the most minimal verbal exchanges (that part was excellent). Aching for company, I developed an addiction to dating apps.

One night, while watching The Rules of Attraction amongst the turtles, I was scrolling on a particularly humiliating app when I received a like from a man who dubbed himself “The O-Man.” The O-Man’s first picture showed an average-looking white guy in his 30s: brown hair, a soft smile. But the rest of the pictures were screenshots of texts—they said things like “daddy you made me come so hard I passed out” and “daddy you made me come 10 times in a row.” His bio read “literal body genius,” with a link to a MEL Magazine article describing him as “the Valley’s secret orgasm whisperer.”

In her piece, sex writer and educator Isabelle Kohn described The O-Man as a personal trainer who had developed innovative physical methods for making women orgasm, over and over, including those who had never been able to come before. His website offers a clear mission statement. “If you’re someone who’s had difficulty coming during masturbation or sex, you may believe you’re ‘broken’ or that there’s something ‘wrong’ with you,” he writes. “You might feel ashamed, angry, confused, or exhausted, told ‘just relax’ or that the problem’s ‘all in your head.’

“Well, what if it wasn’t? What if the secret to unlocking orgasms, greater pleasure, and a more fulfilling, connected sex life wasn’t just in your mind, but in your joints, muscles, and the alignment of your hips and spine?”

The O-Man, a dude with a corny sex superhero name who favors T-shirts with goofy slogans (he is especially fond of one reading “Swole Wars” in the Star Wars font), had apparently discovered the keys to the kingdom. Women told Kohn that he had blown their minds, deeming him a “fucking genius.” I’ve never had trouble with orgasming, but I, like the women she spoke with, wanted to have a million in a row. I quickly messaged The O-Man, signing his requested NDA. He asked for my height and weight (5'10" and not printing it), and then told me to lie down on the ground, put my legs up on a couch or coffee table as opposed to lying with them flat, touch myself, and tell him how much better it felt than usual. It really did—a faster, stronger sensation. Of course, I can only speak to my own experience, but I was hooked, instantly.

The O-Man, who maintains anonymity for obvious reasons, gradually fell into his work as the orgasm sensei of the greater Los Angeles area after working for years as a personal trainer. In 2013 he suffered an accident at, in his words, “a bougie gym in Burbank,” hurting his back (the dorsal scapular nerve, to be specific). He “shrugged the injury off like a dude” for a few years, until he began both physical therapy and psychotherapy. “I got diagnosed with anxiety,” he told Glamour in a phone interview, “and then I began following a basic path of hip stretches and steps to help to relax the throat, which would help with anxiety or panic attacks.”

At the same time, some of The O-Man’s relatives were diagnosed with lung disorders. “To help them,” he said, “I wanted to learn everything that I could about breathing, which also tied into the ribs, which also tied into my injury.”

He studied muscle groups, particularly the deep front line of muscles that provide “stability and structure to your body.” His physical therapist told him to pair the physical exploration with the emotional. “It became a quest to figure out what would affect that deep line,” he said. “And the stuff that I learned that affected the deep line affected all the muscles along it, which include the pelvic floor.

“The important thing to remember is that nothing ever in life or in the body happens in isolation,” he continued. “So in the training context, if you sit and you do a machine that’s a bicep curl, there’s several other things that are happening. Your hips are shortened; you’re on a seat usually. All those things go unquantified while you’re busy working out your bicep. So it’s the stuff that you’re neglecting going through the basic motions that I became very fascinated with, and that’s very easily translated into an intimate context.”

He developed a taste for making women orgasm “for minutes at a time until they have an expanded sexual response and hallucinate,” a claim I would have found absurd until he did it to me.

In 2019, The O-Man put his practical skills to the test. He went on a date with a woman whom he noticed was misaligned; after some exercises, he supposedly made her orgasm 42 times in two hours. She posted about him on a sex-positive Facebook group (“This guy will make you squirt”), urging other women to go see him. He developed a taste for making women orgasm “for minutes at a time until they have an expanded sexual response and hallucinate,” a claim I would have found absurd until he did it to me. In 2020, when the pandemic was in full throttle and his personal training work dried up, he decided to invent a program, a business, now dubbed The O-System, in which one pays a reasonable rate for some very personal training.

In my case, this meant The O-Man sent me a Google Drive folder filled with a simple, inexpensive equipment list (lacrosse balls, foam rollers, yoga blocks), and videos of daily and weekly exercises, some of them high-intensity interval training (HIIT), for me to do, all were designed to improve my posture and alignment, to make me loose and limber so I could orgasm harder and more easily—a physical solution to what is usually described as a mental or emotional problem. He suggests that you masturbate after doing the workouts.

The O-Man asked that I not go into too much detail about his exercises (trade secrets), but they’re not strange to anyone familiar with a basic Pilates course or other forms of somatic, sexological body work. There is one, crucial difference: I have never felt taller, more flexible, or just looser and more relaxed in general than when I keep up with the program. The exercises are astonishing, almost better than the orgasms. In the videos, The O-Man will perform some kind of stretch with his groin and a foam roller, and then demonstrate how it makes his shoulders drop. I did the exercises. My shoulders dropped. I no longer fear becoming Emma, the grim, hunched office worker of the future.

The O-Man offers remote training, an option that people with romantic partners tend to go for (The O-Man works with clients of all genders—anyone and everyone can be misaligned). But I am single, and after three weeks of foam rolling and lacrosse balling, he invited me to his apartment to have a bundle of orgasms. Perhaps it is unwise to go to a stranger’s house for these purposes, but The O-Man and I had already been texting every day for weeks; he is kind, motivating, and complimentary, the ideal personal trainer, never forgetting to check in. I did briefly give pause when he told me that he had somehow injured his eye and would thus be sporting an eyepatch for the duration of our session. Shiver me timbers.

I drove to his place, a complex in North Hollywood. He had given me strict instructions to shower and wear nice lingerie (for those interested, The O-Man can also provide elements of BDSM). His place was full of gym equipment, with countless items I had never seen before: vibrating platforms, frightening ceiling hooks. He led me into the bedroom, where he sat me in an indoor hammock and proceeded to give me the most intense, painful massage I have ever received in my life, using Theraguns and other vibrating tools, from the top of my head all the way to the bottoms of my feet. He used Chinese cupping on my back too—clients get to choose between regular cups or heart-shaped. Aw.

After about 20 minutes of attacking seemingly every muscle in my body, The O-Man told me to stand up and walk around. I did not walk. I floated! Everything felt completely relaxed, like I was melting while standing up, yet I felt taller and stronger than ever. While I shrieked with delight over how wonderful my entire body felt, The O-Man informed me that it was time to make me come. I lay down on the bed, and he used a vibrator on me. I orgasmed a few times very quickly, but it was too sensitive, almost painful. After an open conversation about the sensations I was experiencing (a sort of…repetitive clenching), The O-Man determined that my hips were still tight, so he ravaged them with Theraguns. 

“If your hip flexor is shortened and super, super, super tight,” he said, “that 100% affects your pelvic floor, and that’s 100% something that you can affect almost instantaneously if you know the right spots to hit.” He knew the right spots to hit. After a few minutes of Theragun-ing, he went back to using a vibrator on me, with my feet over his shoulders. I had 12 rolling, screaming orgasms all in a row, no breaks.

The O-Man had fixed a physical problem that I didn’t even know was a problem, allowing me to come over and over again without stopping. Afterward, he proceeded to cuddle me while we had an enlightening conversation about Bravo television programming, i.e., which Real Housewives can have orgasms based on the way he views their posture, wardrobe choices (both stilettos and underwire bras are horrible for alignment), and general demeanor. Lisa Vanderpump was the clear winner. He gave me another foot massage before I left.

I proceeded to see The O-Man regularly for the next few months that I lived in California. His home is a judgment-free zone: he made it easy to communicate about any physical or emotional issues, as people who work in the sex industry often do. I confided in him that I had recently been violently assaulted by an ex, and we worked through the tension in my body that came up when I talked about it. He texted me memes about Vanderpump Rules. He updated my exercises every week. The newfound relaxation in my body applied to romantic partners—I became able to have fast, intense, deep orgasms with pretty much anybody. Sex, after a bleak period following the assault, became joyful again.

But I am just one slutty woman. Are The O-Man’s methods actually sound?

According to medical experts, there is some scientific basis to his practices. “Without being overly familiar with the concept, certainly it wouldn’t be out of the realm of possibility that improving orgasm could be a really fortuitous byproduct of increasing alignment,” said Melanie Stevens Sutherland, a pelvic health physiotherapist and founder of Body Co. Health and Wellness in Toronto. “One of the things we know when we look at pelvic health is that one of the main functions of the pelvic floor is sexual tone [the tone of the vaginal and rectal canals and their ability to contract and relax for a positive sexual experience], enjoyment and pleasure. What we’re looking for is a good balance in muscular tone and muscular mobility. So he’s not wrong that being in good alignment optimizes those conditions.”

“I do agree that alignment is important and that it can definitely impact pelvic pain,” said Christi Pramudji, MD, a urologist and urogynecologist who runs the only urology practice in Texas exclusively dedicated to female patients, often those with sexual dysfunction. “There’s no scientific data or proof, but logically what he does makes sense. Because if things are out of alignment, the muscles are spasming, they’re tightening the blood flow so that is not as good for the pelvic area. It’s possible that [the O-Man’s techniques] really could make a big difference.”

Both Sutherland and Dr. Pramudji, who noted that my descriptions of The O-Man reminded her of Victorian treatments for hysteria, were quick to add that troubles with orgasm tend to be a multipronged issue that require different treatments for different people. Dr. Pramudji treats patients with everything from physical therapy and sex therapy, to medication and hormonal treatments for pelvic pain and lack of arousal, to Cliovana, or sound wave therapy for the clitoris. “We know that the only way to actually truly know what somebody’s pelvic tone [the muscle tone of the pelvic floor, impacting all its functions, including hip and back stability, sexual function, sphincteric function and continence, and the support it offers to the internal organs] is to do an internal exam, and it’s affected by so many other things,” said Sutherland. “It can be really from a whole biopsychosocial perspective. So somebody’s mental state or anxiety, or the resting tone of their nervous system, can impact muscle tone.”

“Bodily intelligence is something I’m very, very proud of and passionate about in terms of my own contribution to the people in my life.”

They added that the most essential sex organ is the brain, and that treating psychological blocks (such as those from sexual trauma or severe anxiety) is often the answer to curing sexual dysfunction. But I’ve found The O-Man helpful there too. In addition to his emphasis on clear, honest communication, he makes every single client say, as they orgasm, that they deserve it. This earned a rave from Tara Suwinyattichaiporn, PhD, a professor of sexual communication at California State University, Fullerton. “In my research, another variable that predicts orgasms is sexual self-esteem, and sexual self-esteem is whether or not you feel you are worthy of pleasure,” she said. “Reiterating verbally that you are worthy of this will fully tell your brain that you are worthy of it. Then one day you know you’re worthy of it.”

Dr. Suwinyattichaiporn, who recently conducted a 5,000-person study determining that sexual mindfulness plays an enormous role when it comes to the ability to orgasm, also thought that The O-Man’s certainty and confidence could contribute to his treatments. “I think it plays a big role in the ability for women to let go and stay present in the moment with pleasure,” she said. “Instead of thinking about, ‘Oh, I have to move my hips this way. I have to do this. I want to make sure he’s happy. I don’t even know what I look like. I’m a little self conscious about my body.’ So many things, right? But if he’s able to be there and like, ‘Listen, I’ll take the wheel. You enjoy,’ you’re really able to tap into your sexual mindfulness.”

The O-Man is, ultimately, there for your pleasure (and to soothe your pain; while hunched over my laptop like Golem, writing this article, I paused every hour or so to do his recommended neck stretches). “Bodily intelligence is something I’m very, very proud of and passionate about in terms of my own contribution to the people in my life,” he says. “I want people to be able to tell their own story through their own bodies.” My posture now tells you everything you need to know.

Portable, lightweight and durable, these dreamy loungers will change your chill-out game for good.

April Salazar chose to have an abortion at 21 weeks gestation after doctors discovered a lethal birth defect. She shares her story with Yahoo Life.

Hailey Bieber on her and Justin Bieber's health scares: 'We both are dealing with older illnesses'

In Jennifer Lopez's new documentary "Halftime," she says she was never "ashamed" of her curves.

More than 30,000 shoppers give these mixing bowls a five-star rating.

All it takes is a sudden voltage spike or an intense electrical storm to fry your computer or TV. Choose safety first—and save money, too.

The "Isn't It Romantic?" star recently shared that she is in a new relationship with her "Disney princess," Ramona Agruma.

"I don’t want anyone you love to die because of the abject failure of our government," Busy Philipps wrote.

If his big day has snuck up on you, expedited shipping is available for all of these options.

Dwayne Johnson is celebrating the small moments of fatherhood.

The Eufy BoostIQ RoboVac 30 is smart, silent and efficient — and down to $130 right now.

In Jennifer Lopez's new Netflix documentary Halftime, the superstar gets personal about tabloid culture and body image.

Score half off popular outdoor cushions and $60 off a top-rated Bissell vac.

Just because it’s hot in the summer doesn’t mean it won’t rain. Make sure you are ready when the rain comes with these umbrellas.

Janelle No. 5 takes her influence from empowered, successful figures in her life and channels it into fierce and high-energy drag.

Which foods are safe to cook in the microwave, and which should you skip?

The "Punky Brewster" star says she recently enlisted the help of a new appliance to make her cooking dreams a reality.

Upgrade your entire kitchen and broaden your cooking horizons with these three amazing deals on high quality cookware from Amazon. Get ready to make homemade pizza, soup, or fried chicken wings.

The "Glee" star has previously posted body-positive content on Instagram.

The "Austin Powers" star promoted her swimwear line on social media while sporting a black bikini.